"Any fool can run towards the light. It takes a master with courage to turn and face the darkness and shine his own light there."
-- Leslie Fieger
Last night I had a vision during my weekly Wed spiritual bath. It was clear as day and I felt like I was there. I could hear the water in the stream that the Goddess was standing in. I felt the cold water shock my system that I was standing in. It was amazing and has redirected my purpose.
You see I wasn’t going to take my spiritual bath at first because it had gotten late and sleep is so important to me. But lately I’ve been forcing myself to do it anyway and last night was no exception.
As soon as I hit the water everything changed. The vision hit quickly and I was trying to keep up. The Goddess came to me and told me that I was doing okay with everything…in fact better then She had hoped. That brought tears to my eyes because I feel so scattered and like nothing fits right now. And to prove my point I fell apart in front of Her; fragmenting into a thousand shards of light.
She laughed and held out Her hand and I sprang back together but as I did I saw a core of pulsating, warming…love. I saw everyone’s faces or blog names that have reached out to me and their light combined with mine. It was beautiful beyond words.
But then She opened this gateway between two trees and She showed me that my light was in everyone I touch, write or connect with in anyway. She shared with me a few people I have moved deeply that I never even realized. I cried the whole time at the beauty of giving and receiving and the power of friendships…even with people I’ve never met.
And then She said the most incredible thing that had me stunned. “I want you to take this experience and make it into a shawl. Make one side flow into the other and show the center…show the balance between give and take. When one wears it let them be immersed in a center of love through the shared community of all they have touched.”
And then I saw it. And it was beautiful. So I give you the beginnings of the Joanne’s Shawl. I am dedicating it to my giving, wonderful MIL who has always been there to support me in times of trouble. She gives to her community and family with her whole self. She cares for all creatures, great and small and will lovingly feed any animal that comes close. lol She always is quick with ideas to help people when they feel all is lost and she will always lend her time to help someone in need. She is an inspiration and a beautiful person. I love her so much!
Hopefully I will have some time on Monday to lock myself away and work on this a bit. I know that any pattern takes time and a shawl like the one I saw is a whole new design to me. But I’m excited about the whole process of creating something beautiful without a time table or deadline. This shawl as much as it is for my MIL, it is also for me. It is a balm for my soul, a gift from the Goddess and a spiritual connection to all I hold dear.
When I looked into the darkness of my inner despair I saw all of you. Thank you for helping me to find my light again by sharing yours.