Where Do I Go From Here?

This was taken at night with no flash because this is how I feel. Right now I feel that the light is outside of me because I have been spreading myself so thin that there is nothing left of me. It could just be a passing moment but I think it is more than that.

Have you ever woken up and felt different than the day before? Well, that’s how I’ve been feeling this whole week. It isn’t everything that’s changed, just certain aspects.

One thing that hasn’t changed is my love of knitting. Knitting to me is like feather and fan; invoking serenity and peacefulness. Sure there are days of cursing when a project doesn’t work out, but that is all part of the process.

It amazes me that my skills as a knitter have been growing by leaps and bounds. My love of lace astounds me since a year ago I was afraid of YOs. LOL

I love designing lace patterns and it has become such a passion as of late it scares me. I even dream in lace. :)
Knitting seems to fulfill all the needs that aren’t fulfilled by family, friends and my job. I love being able to send gifts of yarn goodness to a friend who is down or making something for the needy. It is nice that this wonderful gift helps me to give back.

It also has filled the niche for a community in my life. Every week sitting at the LYS I enjoy talking with the wonderful women who sit and knit around the table. I know that I can go in there any day and just sit and feel appreciated and loved. It is like entering a giant heart chakra. How can I not find my bliss?

I am happy that I am teaching too. It is so wonderful to share myself with someone else; to give back.

I think it is time for a Spring cleaning within. I can’t eek a little of me everywhere and survive anymore. I could when I didn’t have a child, but now I want to spend as much time with my son as I can. He is such a blessing to my life I try not to miss a moment of his.

So something has to go and it cannot be my knitting. My knitting weaves a thread through my being like a lifeline is used on lace. Take away my fiber and I might go insane.

No for me knitting is like breathing; necessary and automatic. No meditation has ever worked for me like knitting. Knitting can be done anywhere and at any time. It is the perfect activity for me.

So, for now, I will knit and breathe and slowly clean out the aspects of my being that are no longer pieces of me and hopefully uncover my true essence in the process.

Happy crafting,

Ruinwen
:)

My Dirty Little Secret

I hate to cast on. I know, how could a knitter even admit such a thing? It isn’t that I don’t like new projects, challenges and the feel of a new yarn between my fingers. That isn’t it at all. I just really have trouble keeping track of how many stitches are on my needles.

Have you ever counted CO stitches three times and each time you get a new number? This happens to me all the time. I started using marker rings to count off sections after making sure they were the correct number. But when you have 200 stitches to cast on this seems to waste time I could be knitting.

The Yarn Harlot, a knitting Goddess, IMHO, of our age, says: “I cast on the approximate number, then count them as many times as it takes to get the right number twice.

So it seems I’m not alone. But let me tell you that was little comfort when I cast on last night for a lace scarf. I was oh so proud that I had the correct number of stitches only to find the pattern was off by 10 stitches. *sigh*

Happy crafting,

Ruinwen
:)

You've gotta Have Faith

Isn't it amazing how the mess on the left will transform into the bootie on the right?

Knitting never seeks to astound me! I remember the first time I knitted booties. I wondered how this (see left bootie to be) would ever become anything but a failed WIP. But after picking up the rows a little nubbly thing emerged. Somehow all that weirdness was necessary for the yarn to become a bootie.

Lace never stops confounding and amazing me also. You do all those YOs and K2tog and other decreases/increases and suddenly a pattern emerges from the fabric. Wow!

Kinda like Spring. See the flower in the picture for proof. it is really cold today and it actually flurried this morning but signs still point to the fact it is actually...Spring. There is a cold little robin on the lawn and even though the flowers have closed up, they are still there.

They believe while I am a bit unsure. I was doubtful that I would make it home today when wires fell over the road due to the high winds. But I had faith that my car at least has more sense then I do and hoped that the three people I asked (all with different routes) knew what they were talking about. And see, I made it home in time to spare to take a picture and post a bit.

I've found as of late that when a pattern is asking the impossible of you, don't look with human eyes. Look through the eyes of your inner knitter (that is if the pattern has been tested) and follow the pattern of your heart (a pattern is only a suggestion anyway) and you will achieve your goal.

Happy crafting,

Ruinwen
:)

When Yarn Tangles...

"For a long time, it had seemed to me that life was about to begin -- real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be got through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last, it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life." 

-- Fr. Alfred D’Souza

It seems as of late that I can’t seem to find time to blog and I realized it was because I was waiting for life to stop for a few precious seconds. And then I read that quote above and it all became crystal clear; there will never be time because life doesn’t stop for me to blog. I just have to do it and then suddenly, “poof” that time I have been craving has been birthed into existence and a new entry is born.

Lately, life has seemed so unbalanced; like a center-pull ball that tangles and you spend hours trying to calm it back into some semblance of yarn.

On Tuesday I spent a majority of my precious knitting time helping a fellow winder with a hank gone bad. I guess because it wasn’t my problem it actually was fun to work with her untangling this mass of spring-green wool. People asked us what we were doing as they entered the store and we joked, “Abstract art, yarn-chi and just plain having fun.”

The funny thing was I did have fun doing nothing more than slowly rolling a ball out of the yarn that escaped the moorings of the huge snarl. I would find a path that would release a little more precious wool back into my care as my partner teased the knots loose one by one.

My life as of late is a lot like that ball of yarn. There are places where it has gotten a bit tangled and I have a choice to see these roadblocks as boulders in my path or rest-stops where I need to pause, asses the situation and breathe before finding where this new knot is going to go.

The next time I find myself with a tangle in my fiber I will remember that the Universe is not out to get me but rather it is giving me a yarn-awakening. (The Universe uses yarn to teach lessons all the time.) The yarn is telling me that I’ve overdone it again and it is time to slow down.

I will take time to breathe and remember that this is my life. Yoda said something to the effect of, “There is no good or bad, only thinking makes it so.” It is so true I can label every yarn snarl in the road of life as bad or take a tip from my cat and breathe, stretch and play.

Happy crafting,

Ruinwen, who loves hand-winding her yarn
:)

My Beautiful New Knitting Bag

First and foremost, please let me apologize for the counter in the background. But it was the only place with good lighting at 5:30 am. :(

I love my new bag from Nana Sadie Rose! I got to pick out the pattern which I loved at first sight! Sallee put a beautiful cat button on the front which really sets it off.

It is so roomy; I can put patterns, even books fit in there. Right now I have six balls of yarn and it is not even full!

Thank you so much, Sallee! I've been giving out cards to everyone 'cuz they all love this bag.

Happy Crafting,

Ruinwen
:)

New Project

I fell in love with this top and it seemed the perfect yarn just appeared at my LYS.

It is from the latest issue of Vogue Knitting. You make it in a bunch of pieces and then put the sleeves, front and back altogether on a circ. I'm insane for even wanting to try it now. Everything is so crazy trying to get ready for Fair. But when you're in love, what can one do?

So once again my poor Queen of Hearts shawl has gotten pushed back. I'll get to it just not until after Fair. :(

New Yarn!!! :)

My LYS has a wonderful woman who makes spins and dyes her own yarn and I love it! She had a special trunk show this week and this is what I took home.

The ball that is on the left is all wool in blue, green and purple hues. It goes from super thin to chunky and my son picked it out to make a baby sweater. The problem is that I've swatched it twice and it comes out different each time. I've also cast on twice only to find that the sweater is bigger than two of me! But I promised my child that this would turn into a sweater and by all that is sacred, it will...just not today. :)

Next, we have more yummy merino in a lovely sky blue color. It has already been dedicated to the capped top above.

And last but not least, the spring rose garden cotton/wool blend. It was so beautiful I couldn't pass it up but I have no idea what to make with it. It also changes sizes throughout so the three things I've cast on didn't look quite right to me. Any ideas?

It really isn't like me to buy yarn that isn't slated for some project. C'est le vie.

Butter Baby Sweater Update

I've almost finished the butter baby sweater. All that's left is the left side seaming. But I thought it looked nice enough to take a pic.

This is a fun sweater to make and since it is all in one piece, there are only two side seams. You can pick up and cast on for a hood or a collar. I chose a simple collar that increased one stitch on each side for six rows and it looks nice IMHO. Now all I need is a set of booties to complete the outfit!

I'm going to make another one of these in teal King Cole yarn. I love the King Cole yarn it is so smooth and soft!

Serenity Chain Lace Scarf

Here is the prototype scarf for my class. It is made out of Knitpicks Decadence 100% Superfine Alpaca in Winter Berry. The color is totally off; it is more of a deep burgundy.

You can't see the texture either that defines the chain but c'est le vie.

I've been knitting it like mad to get it done to hand into the LYS today. The chart really helped. For my class, I'm going to make it in something thinner to see how it looks in a different yarn.

Happy crafting,

Ruinwen
:)

Uncharted Waters

I don't know what gave me the sudden gift of being able to read (and write) a knitting chart, but I am ever so thankful!

This is my chart for my lace class. My DH downloaded the knitting font for me. He is always so sweet and helpful!

I don't know what finally clicked, but when I looked over all those lace patterns I knew how much easier they would be if I charted them! So I did. It is so much easier to knit from a chart than from the written out pattern! I couldn't believe it! I was able to follow the chart while watching TV in the dark, I might add.

So after May Fest, I'm going to pull out all those lace patterns that I had previously deemed confusing and gleefully complete them!

Happy crafting,

Ruinwen
:)

Ode to Mom, Butter and King Cole

It is days like this that I am glad my Mom taught me to knit. She is a textile goddess and used to make the most beautiful things before her arthritis took hold. I know she misses creating things from beautiful fabrics and it makes me sad to see such a wonderful gift taken from her.

I know that being able to knit is a gift and I will treasure it as long as I am able; just like my Mom. Her cancer has come back again. I know she is scared and mad because I am too. I can do nothing but love her (as I have always done), be there for her, pray and send Reiki. Even so, I feel helpless, lost and desperately out of control.

The only thing I can think to do is knit something simple; something she will like. So I am knitting another baby sweater. My mom adores babies. Something comes alive in her that is so beautiful to see when she is with my son: something akin to spring gracing a barren world. So I am making this sweater out of King Cole Smooth in buttermilk. It is the softest acrylic yarn I have ever touched. I feel like I am knitting with liquid butter. I know mom will love it too.

I had to re-gauge the whole pattern for the King Cole and let me tell you after casting on and frogging 6 times I thought maybe this wasn’t the project for me! My Mom is a mathematician. She would have figured out how to convert all these stitches on the first try. I did not get that gift but I do have tenacity and I was not about to let the yarn win on this one! I finally figured it out and the pattern is working.

I’m enjoying row after row of smooth buttery garter. Simple, classic and wonderful to come back to after such a stressful day; again just like my Mom. My Mom has always been about the simple pleasures in life. She loves spending time with family. She taught me family is one of the most important gifts we have. Ours celebrates every milestone with a dinner. She also taught me that while you are alive you need to eat and it should be something you enjoy. She is a wonderful cook (I really think the math helps there too). I love her home cooking she always puts so much love and care into everything.

The color of the King Cole reminds me of Mom and butter. She would spend hours sautéing mushrooms until they were just right. Everything in our house was cooked in either olive oil, butter or both. It was never greasy but mmmmmm just right. My favorite thing in the whole world is my Mother’s potato pancakes. She would always make them when I couldn’t eat anything else. I’ve tried to make them the same but mine while good, are not moms. There is something about all the love she put into stuff that I can’t seem to duplicate.

There is no one quite like my mom. She always makes me laugh and cheers me up when I am down. She will give a stranger the shirt off of her back to help him out. She is talented beyond belief. She is has a sweet romantic side balanced by the Alias side. I can talk to her about anything and she really listens. I’m not saying she is perfect, because no one is, but she has ALWAYS been there for me and there is no greater gift then that. What can I say, she’s a great mom, and I am so blessed that she is mine. :)

As I knit some more rows on the sleeve level of this sweater I start to think about the cute little arms that will fill it. We’ve been trying for a while now. I’ve had to dissociate myself from the outcome because I was getting too disappointed each month. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy with my family the way it is and I will be happy if we have another child. It is all blessings to me and it is all out of my hands. The waiting is always what I’ve been bad at…

So I will knit and cherish my Mom and all of my family and friends; which includes you the reader. All of you make life more enjoyable and fun. I will be happy and content with what I have and if more comes I will open my arms and take it in. And I will knit with this beautiful yarn in simple stitches over and over until I reach meditative bliss.

Happy crafting,

Ruinwen
:)

Charity Items

Here are the items for the Changing Lanes Charity. The booties are really washed out but they are white with flecks of pink and blue eyelash. I really had trouble knitting them on size three needles with the eyelash getting in the way but they came out really cute.

The jacket I did in a popcorn type yarn that was also surprisingly madding to work with. But I think it came out cute as a button and I would make it again popcorn and all. It was a very fun pattern done in one piece and then sewed at the sides.

I wish I could have made more....as always...but I'm really happy with the items I made!

Ruinwen
:)

1Year Today!

It is my blog anniversary! Yes, I can hardly believe it has been one whole year since I started blogging.

I have learned so much. I have made really wonderful friends that I treasure deeply. :)

i have knitted things in the past year that I previously thought impossible thanks to my friends who inspire and show me the way when I've dropped a row (or two). Now I don't fear new stitches or patterns; I invite them in. I love to try new things and feel new yarns in my fingers making different stitches.

Another thing I have always wanted to do I finally worked into my schedule; going to my LYS once a week to sit with other knitters and just enjoy the community that comes with crafting.

Speaking of community; I made sure to include charity giving in my crafting. For to me giving back is as important as breathing. I even ran a charity for orphans in the Fall.

Speaking of running things; our home store Vixenpath made its official debut at Spring Fling and it was so much fun we went back for Fall Fest. My DH learned to make chain-mail and he has some of the most beautiful jewelry I have ever seen IMHO.

What a wonderful year! And thanks you to you just for looking!

Bright blessings,

Happy Crafting,

Ruinwen
:)

Branching Out Scarf

ETA:  photo lost - this yarn was very purple with dark accents

I've been wanting to try Knitty's Branching Out Scarf for a while now but I've been working on so many other things. I wanted to do it for the Olympics but I just wasn't sure I could get it done in time. But I cast on anyway and here is what I got done while watching it snow today.

It is a 10-row repeat pattern and this isn't the best picture but I am enjoying this project immensely.

The yarn I'm using is Cascade Peruvian wool and it has a lovely blue sheen that really makes it shine. This was really a test to see if I could make this scarf and it really was no problem. After I finish it I will make another one in my long-forgotten handspun angora that my sister gave me last year for my birthday. I think it will really show off the lacy pattern.

I'm pretty excited! I also have two more balls to wind of merino and I will finally begin my heart shawl! I looked over the pattern today and there is nothing in there I haven't done before...only 52 rows repeated 12 times. LOL Okay so it will be October before I can wear it...but I will get it done this year...Goddess willing. :)

Be safe where ever you are in blog land and happy crafting.

Ruinwen
:)

Mike's Feather and Fan Blanket

I love this pattern! It is so much fun! I have never knitted feather and fan before but I really like it! The merino I am using is so beautiful that it is really a joy to knit.

Can you tell I'm really happy about this baby blanket? LOL

Happy crafting everyone!

Ruinwen
:)

Mike's Baby Blanket

ETA: Lost this photo. The yarn for this looked like a Victorian garden with sunshine.

How I loved casting it on and knitting a few rows just to let the merino wash away the stress from my last project.

I love the feel of merino. It slides on my addis and I find myself lost in the simple rhythm of its beauty. I feel like I am soaking in a hot tub of bubbles and I find myself totally refreshed. Ahhhhhh! :)

I love this yarn! It is so beautifully hand-painted. This is a new pattern for me and I am excited to try feather and fan for the first time! :)

Happy crafting!

Ruinwen
:)

The Baby Blanket From He-double Toothpicks

ETA: Another photo lost.

 Never has a project vexed me more than this blanket. Normally a blanket takes me a week to make; this took 2 months I'm ashamed to say.

What did I learn? If you make a mistake and you know that you need to fix it - don't hesitate! If you are talking on the phone while knitting; don't let the yarn drop off your needles. And finally, don't let the yarn win.

As you can see the blanket didn't even want to pose for its debut. The colors are dull compared to what they truly are and it would not come into focus no matter what I did.

But it is done and in the mail tomorrow! :)

Prayer Shawl Complete!

My prayer shawl is done! I loved the Plymouth Encore; it was a joy to work with! I fringed the shawl with beautiful ribbon yarn and more Encore.

Happy crafting!

Ruinwen
:)

Scarf In Showstopper

ETA:  Lost this picture in the update.  Makes me sad all the projects that have disappeared. 

This scarf was made in Showstopper yarn which is three different yarns: Paris Nights (which is a thin ribbon), Eyelash (which is pale green and copper) and pale green Mohair.

I realize this was not on my list of things to do but I saw it on Tuesday at my LYS and fell in love with it. This scarf took maybe two hours to make on size 15 needles and I enjoyed every minute of it.

It is beautiful, which the picture does not show. It shimmers and glimmers and it oh so soft.

A nice diversion.... :)

Meme of the Day

Sallee had this meme on her blog so I thought I would participate.

4 JOBS YOU HAVE HAD IN YOUR LIFE
Counselor
Admin Assist
Techie for the theater
Healer

4 MOVIES YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER
Ledgend
Laybrinth
Ladyhawke
Midsummer Night's Dream

4 PLACES YOU HAVE LIVED
Potomac, MD
The Blue Ridge Mountains, VA
Gaithersburg, MD
Mt. Airy, MD

4 TV SHOWS YOU LOVE TO WATCH
Battlestar Galactica (the new series)
Yes Dear
Pokemon
Charmed

4 PLACES YOU HAVE BEEN ON VACATION
Colonial Beach, VA
Hershey Park, PA
Daytona, FL
Hawaii

4 WEBSITES YOU VISIT DAILY
yahoo.com - for e-mail and daily crossword
Click to Fund Mamograms
All Updated RSS feeds for blogs (that counts right?)
Sorry - I don't have time for more then that each day :)

4 FAVORITE FOODS
Sushi
Mocha Lite Frapucchino, no whip, at Starbucks
Italian coldcuts
Potato pancakes

4 PLACES YOU WOULD RATHER BE RIGHT NOW
With my DH
With my son
With my family
At my LYS

There you go!

Happy crafting and have a great day!

Ruinwen
:)